Taking a lone twin to hospital-surviving twin mentioned

[kimbobt84-BensMummy]

 Holly's not been very well, she has a viral infection, mild croup and a possible water infection. She was sent to a&e last night as she was so ill-but in true Holly style woke up this morning singing high school musical!

 At the hospital they always ask about Holly's history like they do with any other child, so of course i have to tell them everything about her twin brother Ben. It's hard having to go into it all.
 
 It's also so hard to get my head around the fact Holly is ok. It just doesn't make sense to me that i carried them both together, at the same time, doing the same things-yet Ben was so poorly and Holly so healthy.

 Just another hurdle of being a lone twin x

[Bretts mummy Emma]

  huge hugs Kim I can't even begin to imagine how difficult this had to be for you. I am glad that Holly is ok tho hunni a weight of your mind I'm sure

[mel - jakesangelmummy]

Glad Holly is feeling better Kim

It does seem strange that Ben and Holly shared such a small space for such a long time, yet things turned out so differently for them   Perhaps Ben was looking after his sister, even then

 

[kimbobt84-BensMummy]

A doctor once told me that his religious beliefs were that Ben, as a male, sacrificed his life for Holly, that rather than have two weak twins-he gave everything of his to Holly so that she could survive. I know they were non-identical therefore two seperate babies growing alongside each other, and i know that the problems Ben had were most probably due to a small blood clot that affected ben's development but just putting it simple-they grew inside me at the same time, i did the same things

[Bretts mummy Emma]

Maybe Ben did give everything he had for Holly to survive because he knew how much she would be loved and cherished always, he maybe also wanted to watch over you all and preferred not to have his sister with him but with you instead. Ben isn't here which makes you sad yet Holly is your reason to look into her eyes and smile.

[kimbobt84-BensMummy]

 I always say i'm lucky to have Holly but no more lucky than having the older girls as there should be two. I still lost a child, i still lost my little boy, my precious only son, and i have to live with the 'there should be two' for the rest of my life. God i've so much going around in my head lately. I put Holly down for her nap and she has the cheekiest smile i've ever known-it melts my heart, and it also breaks my heart-she was laid in bed being cheeky and i just thought how much more cheeky would it be with the two of them laid there together, makes me smile at the thought-they'd have been such monkeys together x

[Bretts mummy Emma]

Kim to a certain degree I know what you mean in that today I attended my lc christmas carol concert and watched my boys singing their little hearts out, it just hurt so badly that Brett should have been there too singing those christmassy songs and getting excited about Father Christmas coming  I have always said that I must have done something really awful in a past life to be tortured like this in ithis one  xxxx

[ConniesMammy.]

Kim im glad little Holly is feeling better,and im sure your Ben is there with you always, and i wonder if he did give his life for her did he also have a helping hand in her cheekiness and sense of humour?

Emma as we all know deep down we did nothing wrong hun,we only loved our babies and god only knows why,one day we WILL find out.
 kisFor Kim    For Emma.x.

[liz holdsworth]

  Ive no words to say hun only Ben is always here watching over you and your family, doesnt make it any easier i know but i cant think of anything to say. Big hugs for you, kisses for Holly and Floaty kisses for Ben xxx

[Olliemam+1]

Kim

I am pleased to here that your Holly is on the mend, I can not imagine how hard it must be for you each and everyday, sending you loads and loads of 

Take care

Dawn xxxxx. 

[***clairelouise-finlays mummy ***]

  kim life is so cruel ... so glad holly is ok . cuddles to you hun x

[GillyF]

Kim,

Hope Holly's fully recovered now.

My son's almost 3 and just before Christmas I took him to the docs because the cough he had was awful and he had a temperature. I couldn't see a GP, but saw a terrific nurse (we were visiting the in-laws in Ireland) and I had to tell her that he had never seen a GP before and was a surviving twin. It was important for me to let her know that I didn't take him to see a doc at the drop of a hat, and it's one of the reasons I find my loss so difficult to accept. One day you're leaving your Christmas arrangement on your baby's grave and two days later his surviving twin brother is getting antibiotics for the first time, and has never seen a GP.

Best wishes,
Gilly